Issue #232 Just Messing With Machines | Scooter, Motorcycle, Have, Like, Out

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Issue #232 Just Messing With Machines

Written by John Campbell
Thursday, 12 July 2007
The fact is, I didn’t think Piaggio’s MP3 really even had a place in a motorcycle magazine. I’ve long held the belief that scooters aren’t motorcycles and scooter riders aren’t motorcyclists. I use a very loose rule of thumb: motorcycles don’t have step-through frames and, despite a trendy new train of thought, scooter riders don’t “graduate” to motorcycles when they’ve served their small displacement apprenticeship. If in fact I’m wrong, and scooter riders really are moving up, then I’m willing to admit I didn’t see that one coming. But, before I begin eating my hat, I’d like to see the evidence. In my view, typical scooter riders don’t graduate to motorcycles, they graduate from degree programs, then go on to buy cars for their commutes out of the suburbs. Or they rent 50cc scooters from beach outlets then zip around resort towns in their flip-flops, beeping horns, terrorizing the locals and ultimately skewing insurance statistics when they bang into fire hydrants. This, incidentally, is often referred to as a “motorcycle-related accident” by insurers who can’t (or won’t) distinguish between committed motorcycle riders and all that that implies, and the skylarking tourist who needs only the most modest driver’s licence and a few bucks to slap down for an hour of fun. The obvious exceptions to all the above are the Burgman and Silver Wing class—big-displacement machines that are attracting “retiring” motorcyclists who have their own reasons (often health related) for going to the power scooter genre. But these are people with years of experience on two wheels and millions of collective miles under their belts. They’ve earned the “right” to ride whatever they damn please and still be considered bikers. Then, of course, there is the bohemian set drawn to tricked-out Lambrettas and Vespas of vintage pedigree—this crowd is heavily influenced by the film Quadrophenia and the mods and rockers scene of 1960s Britain. Again, an entirely different breed of cat. I can’t and won’t attempt to explain the philosophy behind the Mad Bastard Scooter Rally organized by Rob Harris of the motorcycle website Canadian Motorcycle Guide Online other than to point out that Mr. Harris is a displaced Brit living in Montreal. The lean, lanky Englishman with the iconoclastic sense of humour probably sees great fun in the event but perhaps there’s some bit of sobriety in it as well: Harris, after all, is the only person I can think of who would deliberately book a press scooter (Honda’s quirky Ruckus) to see Daytona during Bike Week. That was several years ago and Harris has since gone on to test numerous scooters—he may well be the resident expert in the Canadian press corps when it comes to the genre. But all this is still “outside the norm.” Though the Canadian market has experienced an incredible infusion of scooter choices—from China, Italy, Korea and Japan—and many motorcycle magazines have visibly demonstrated a deep confusion about the significance of the machines to the motorcycling community, we at Canadian Biker simply have not been willing to take the bait. Motorcycles are motorcycles, scooters are scooters, and that’s that. Further confusing the issue is the arrival of intriguing conveyances such as Can-Am’s three-wheeled Spyder, the Belgian-built Carver One which promises to be “something that will make you go out of your way to find curvy roads. You steer it like a car, but when cornering it banks like a motorcycle while you feel like you are flying a jetfighter.” Fascinating premise—a jetfighter yet. Reaching a little further into recent history are other examples of machines that blur the lines and make it difficult for motosport enthusiast editors to keep perspective: BMW’s C1, the Hayabusa-powered T-Rex, and even the lamented Sparrow from California-based aftermarket seat manufacturer, Corbin. Perhaps it should come as no surprise then, that a device such as the MP3 is now being lumped into the increasingly flexible category of “motorcycle.” The first opportunity I had to see it up close was probably the same as yours: it came at a motorcycle show over the winter. Probably much like yourself, I saw it as mildly amusing thing that would probably have no lasting significance to motorcyclists. I still think that’s true. Had you suggested then that by April I’d actually be out and about on the streets of Victoria with it, well, I might have disagreed. Still, it did look as though it might be a spot of fun. The Canadian Scooter Corporation is our national distributor for Piaggio, Aprilia, Derbi and Moto Guzzi. When they suggested we might like to testride the MP3, it was all I could do not to sniff in haughty disdain. “We’re a motorcycle magazine,” I reminded anyone standing too close to my general vicinity. But then I had to make one of those self-inspections we all dread. I remembered the Burgman 400 and 650 as machines that changed my mind about the potential of scooters to be something radically different. I also (sheepishly) recalled the fun day I spent with my nieces who were visiting from out of town. Born and raised in the country, around horses, livestock and machinery, they’re always up for a challenge. They wanted to rent scooters and prowl Victoria; moreover they wanted me to join them. I remember it as a wonderful day of beeping horns and crazy veering—skylarking. So, maybe it wouldn’t be such a stretch, such an odious chore, to climb aboard the MP3 and just have a little fun with what turned out to be a very charismatic machine. People were actually doing double-takes as I rolled around town. I realized I was having a grand time—well, until two guys in a truck rolled down the window at a traffic light and asked aloud: “When do the training wheels come off?” They were just kidding, but that pretty much took the edge off the day and made me realize that for all its zany charm, the MP3 is still just a curiosity, not a truly definable thing ... not like a real scooter. But what the heck, sometimes it’s worthwhile to climb off your high horse and get out with a machine that’s just plain old good for giggles. For the record though, I still don’t believe scooters should be in a motorcycle magazine—and the MP3 isn’t even a real scooter. Comments (0) Subscribe to this comment's feed Write comment You must be logged in to a comment. 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